The last month has been stressful to the point where I haven't even felt like writing about it. For the most part, none of this stress has anything to do with me being transgendered, so I wasn't sure how much of it necessarily belongs here. That said, things are starting to look up, and so I thought I would take a moment or two to reflect on things.
On Father's Day last month, I got into a pretty large argument with a family member. I'm not going to write too much here about that, except that some pretty hurtful things were said on both sides and that I hope it can be resolved at some point.
My job has been getting steadily tougher. We're trying to do a lot of different things at the same time, and that means there has been a steady increase in my workload. I can take solace in the fact that I'm certainly learning new things and developing job skills; however, none of this really seems to matter when the rate at which work is being assigned work exceeds the rate at which it can be completed. I have good days and bad days - sometimes, I am completely on fire and even I can't believe how many different tasks I can do at once; sometimes, I feel so overwhelmed that I'm about to panic. I'm not alone, either - with record-breakingly-bad weather through this summer, I've noticed a general sort of funk that it just seems that people can't escape as of late. Really, the main way that I've been able to get through it is to see it all as an opportunity for growth, from both a personal and a career angle, and to think about that whenever the stress starts to take over.
After years of not using AIM, I've started talking to people online again. Specifically, through the Something Awful forums I have been a number of transgendered people who I have found to be incredibly nice and interesting. There are a few transpeople who are young in transition (or still pre-everything) who I feel I can help; there are a few transpeople who are roughly where I am in transition with whom it's fun to goof around with and compare notes; there are a few straight people who are curious about being transgendered and want to ask me questions. I have always been really open about anything I'm thinking or feeling, and there's something that feels really good to me when other people reciprocate that. More and more, I'm finding that I enjoy helping people - I have been trying to find ways to take this and channel it into something that can make a difference for as many people as possible.
Today is my last day of work before I head up to a music festival in New York state for the weekend. This will be my first real vacation since...shoot, I don't remember when my last vacation was. The theme of 2009 thus far has been "Michelle is stressed out", and three days in a new environment filled with music and friendly people will hopefully provide some sort of time out that will allow me to recharge my proverbial batteries. Also, I'm still flying out to Denver in two weeks - it will be the first time I've been on an airplane in 5 years.
I got my ears pierced! They look awesome! I also got my hair restyled - I'm now straightening it instead of curling it, and I like the way it looks so far. Fortunately, I haven't really had to spend much on summer clothes since it's been so dreary out. :)
Well, my half-hour of writing time is up. Time to get ready for what will likely be a long day!
